What Happens With Bad Customer Service

Note to companies: If you treat your customers poorly, you’ll make for good internet fodder.  This is an e-mail from someone I know that had a bad experience at a car lot whose motto is, “we listen!” and I think it’s hilarious.  The customer doesn’t always have to be right, but they’re still the customer and with social media, it’s easy to get a bad rap.  I blanked out the company names (except the good one) but a quick google search will point you in the right direction if you want to find more….regardless how you feel, it’s pretty cool to see someone lose their mind:

Dear xxx xxxx:

You have signs all over the valley with big ears implying that you listen.  Hell, you even answer the phone and SAY that you listen….I was skeptical right off the bat because you never shut up about the self-promoting “fact” that you listen.  In fact, I have serious doubts that you finish reading this paragraph without pausing and mumbling “holy shit” to yourself before moving on to the next one because of your inability to let someone else say anything without injecting your own bullshit as an intermission.

I brought my mustang in AFTER your sales department told me they have a jeep that they got from another location.  I asked if it was there and they told me “yes, it got here yesterday”.

I showed up and they valued my car and all of a sudden the jeep I asked about was sold the day before and they try to sell me a 25k jeep that was nowhere near what I told them.  You guys are a bunch of useless, self-absorbed fucking idiots.  It was a blatant disregard for my needs and my time in order for you to try and get me to trade in something for something else that I wasn’t interested in…at all. I’m surprised you didn’t offer me carrots instead of cash for my car.  Seriously, I’m EXTREMELY surprised that didn’t happen.

SO, I went to Mark Miller instead, bought a 25k jeep because they LISTENED and I even took 500 less on my trade in based solely on the fact that they weren’t a bunch of assholes.  They even sent me a birthday card.  A GODDAMN SURE-AS-SHIT BIRTHDAY CARD!

Also, since I’m 100% aware that your marketing department is great due to the big-ear billboards, I’m also at the conclusion that your sales department is about as lost as a cross-eyed monkey taking a scantron test.

I’ll let you in on a marketing secret..forgive if my math isn’t right on the money, it’s been a while since I’ve been in college – word of mouth is the most powerful form of self promotion.  1 negative review is usually told to 13 people who in turn tell 5 others about their “buddy’s experience”.  That’s 65 people that now know what a piece of shit dealership you are and judging by your google reviews I’m not alone.  I counted 11 horrible reviews on your place all justified by your inability to listen – the ONE thing you try to brag about…that’s 715 more people that can’t stand your customer service.  It’s a matter of time until you implode from the pressure of the amount of sleaze and ineptitude that surrounds your company.

I will not ask you for my $20 in gas money that it cost me to drive out to your lot just to do a facepalm and whisper, “Jesus effing Christ” to myself as I have already asked for that, but again, it fell upon deaf ears.  Instead, I will simply state that if you ever e-mail me again with any kind of survey or promotion I swear to all that is holy and Jenna Jameson that I will overload your inboxes with forwarded porno site subscriptions.  I might even slip in a personal picture just a small victory.

That being said, your marketing department really is great and I like the billboards.

Categories: EVERYTHING (in no particular order), Humor

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

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